AAA: Having a witness to your life.

These are our thoughts feelings and experiences. We accept responsibility for them. We understand your journey may be different. We honor and respect that. Wishing you effortless joy. Eloise and Jake

Many of us have Triple A road service and protection. I am suggesting that there is a similar protection for our spiritual journey needs.

Let’s call it Accountability, Authenticity and Awareness.

So here is the story: A few weeks back I was going into a bad place, needing a great attitude adjustment. So I called my coach, shaman, mentor, therapist person. I just babbled about this and that; and how did I get back into such a dark place. As I widdled down through the issues, it became apparent that this was days of stuffing feelings, and days of ignoring what I knew to be true, and days of letting my power leek away into oblivion.

What I was able to identify is a tad of anger in my veins. (“A TAD” is pretty much an understatement) But I had fallen recently and I was in pain, and remnants of the dog bite to my face surfaced. And a little of this old issue and a little of that old issue, was lingering and the bottom line was I had stopped meditating, being quiet and had stopped praying.

So my assignment was to commit to 10/30. For thirty days I was to spend 10 minutes of quiet time being connected to my self. (Being out of my head and into my body, being connected to my higher power, to my spirit to my guides whatever terminology you want to use) I was directed to either just sit, if I had nothing to say, or scream or speak, or cry or laugh, but the one thing I was not allowed to do is think. This was all about getting out of the analytical, critical, denial producing, cover up inducing head. It was about being authentic, being honest, gut wrenching honest, feeling, and getting back to the knowing in ones soul and heart. Not mind knowing, but soul knowing.

And then I was to write her everyday via email as a way of being accountable. Now the rules were that she was not going to comment or respond, unless she did not hear from me. This process was not about feedback, it was about the ability one has with in them self to become aware.

So the process started 11 days ago, and on one day I received a message of: ?????? because I hadn’t written. After that, the drive to do this on days I didn’t feel like it has kicked in because I know I am being accountable to another tribe member.

That accountability factor is huge. However it is also hard to be authentic when you are spilling gut wrenching feelings to another person you respect and honor. Trust is important here. You really can not do this kind of exercise without a recipient that is trained not to judge, is trained to honor your path, and who accepts you unconditionally. It is also important to have a recipient of this kind of feedback that knows how to dump it, not personalize it, and is able to witness it without feeling responsible to fix it.

The experience I have had so far has been amazing. There have been times of blah, times of anger, and times of incredible awareness. Feelings have surfaced that have stayed repressed by the will of the mind, for ever so long, and some seem like they have been waiting lifetimes to emerge and resolve.

My ten minutes a day has now shifted to twice a day. (Once a day to speak and once a day to listen) Simultaneous with this, has been a revival of peace, and power. Currently I am working on some creativity blockages. And my mind is saying thank god, I don’t have to work so hard.

There has been some integration of my personality that has kept me very compartmental and closed. I am feeling more open, and yet not more vulnerable.

It has been a great experience, and I challenged each of you to try this 10/30 day experiment of being accountable, authentic and aware. Find a witness to your journey, and donate energy back to them as a way of honoring their time and ability to accept your story.